The Ten Commandments of Financial Wisdom #7: Thou Shalt not Compete with the Joneses – Learn Contentment and Be Grateful

Will Smith once said, ‘Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like’.

A profound quote but a very accurate assessment of the state of play in our social media obsessed generation. We live in a world where we have so many privileges and access to so much more than our generations before us, yet many are still discontent.

President Theodore Roosevelt once said, ‘Comparison is the thief of joy’, and it is my belief that comparison is a major cause of discontentment. Comparison in this context is basing your worthiness against other people’s successes – a.k.a competing with the Joneses.

Your friend or neighbour has got a new car, house, or a pay rise. How does that make you feel? Are you genuinely happy for them or are you green with envy? Your response to their change of circumstance will give you a clear idea of where comparison may be hindering you in your life.

We are in a unique situation in that today’s Commandment of Financial Wisdom is actually rooted in God’s original Ten Commandments, specifically the tenth commandment, ‘Thou shalt not covet.’ To covet is defined as follows, ‘to want to have something very much, especially something that belongs to someone else’. Exodus 20:17 (NIV) says:

“You shall not covet your neighbour’s house. You shall not covet your neighbour’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbour.”

You might be thinking that just because you do not currently covet your friend’s ox or donkey, you are off the hook, but don’t get too smug just yet. To my knowledge, none of my friends have an ox or donkey, so rather we need to consider what the metaphorical ox or donkey is in our life.

The major problem with the discontentment that stems from comparison, is that it feeds into greed and pushes people to live beyond their means. I think it’s obvious that the debt crisis we are experiencing today is as a result of people buying more and more ‘stuff’ (that they can’t afford) in order to keep up appearances.

FOMO (The Fear OF Missing Out) is defined as, ‘anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, often aroused by posts seen on social media.’ People are often so gripped by FOMO that they feel internal pressure to chase that ‘thing’ at any cost. The idea that other people are enjoying the ‘thing’ and they aren’t is unbearable and therefore they must have the ‘thing’.

We are focusing on the financial dimension of comparison, but it applies in all areas of life. People compare spouses, careers, even children amongst many other things and it only leads to more unhappiness.

So, what is the solution to ending this cycle of comparison, greed, and unhappiness? Quite simply to be content and be grateful for where you are now and what you’ve been blessed with. We have previously established that some people are given one talent, some three and some five. Know your capacity and run your own race. If you are a one talent person yet you compare yourself to a five-talent person, you are only setting yourself up for frustration.

It is my firm belief that contentment begins with Christ. 1 Timothy 6:6-7 (ESV) says:

‘But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world.’

Being content and grateful is a choice we make every single day. There will always be a new ‘thing’, but the good news is that we don’t need to chase every single new thing that comes out. To bring it back to finance, live within your means and don’t buy on impulse. Ignore the Joneses – learn contentment and gratitude today!

God bless

Ten Talents